A Selection of Wonderland H3's Favorite Hash Songs
This page contains a large number of rude, crude, and
socially unacceptable song lyrics, if you find these sorts of things offensive
then please stop reading now, as the Hash House Harriers probably isn’t for
you. If you are not among the easily offended and generally believe that
political correctness needs to die a horrible death, please continue reading.
For more hash songs, check out the HALF-MIND HYMNAL that can be downloaded here:
Tune: Sponge Bob Square Pants
Lyrics stolen and adapted from: Cpt Princess Pee Pee Pants and SoPiH3
Are you ready Hashers?
Ready Hatter!
I can't heeeaaarrrr yoouuuu!
READY HATTER!
Who runs through Wonderland, with beer in their hand?
Wonderland H3
With Alice, White Rabbit, and a hash-loving band!
Wonderland H3
If running and madness be something you wish...
Wonderland H3
Then come out to the mystical trail and drink me
Wonderland H3
Wonderland H3
Wonderland H3
Wonderlaaaaaand H3
AMAZING HASH
Tune: Amazing Grace
by: G.I. Mary & Joseph, SoPiH3
Amazing Hash
Much shiggy on trail
That trashed a Wank like me
I once got lost
But found the hounds
The On-Home now I see!
Just three more blocks
And I'll be home
The beer, it waits for me
And once I'm there
I'll drink my Share
Until they tire of me!
BIRTHDAY SONGS
BIRTHDAY SONG # 1
Melody - Happy Birthday to You
Happy birthday, fuck you,
Happy birthday, fuck you,
Happy birthday, you asshole, (or dear ......... )
Happy birthday, fuck you.
Drink it down, down, down . . .
BIRTHDAY SONG # 2
Melody - Happy Birthday to You
Happy birthday to you,
Happy birthday to you,
You look like a hasher,
And you smell like one too.
Drink it down, down, down . . .
______
BIRTHDAY SONG # 3
Melody - Here's to _____, He's a Blue
Here's to (name), she's true blue,
It's her birthday, boo hoo hoo,
She is (age) if she's a day,
Wishes she were younger,
But there's no way!
Drink it down, down, down . . .
BIRTHDAY SONG # 4
Melody - Ta-Ra-Ra-Boom-Te-Aay
This is your birthday song,
It isn't very long . . .
Drink it down, down, down . . .
BLESSING OF THE HARES
Optional prayer offered by the religious advisor before the hash, with local embellishments.
Bless these hares,
Bless this trail,
Coppus no catch us,
Farmer no shoot us,
Doggus no bite us,
Heatus no stroke us,
Plenty of cold beer to drink,
Coitus non interruptus.
Down Down Song
Here's to ______. He's true blue.
He's a hasher through and through,
He's a pisspot so they say.
Tried to get to haven,
But he went the other way.
Drink it down, down, down, down
HASH HOUSE HARRIERS
Melody - Addams Family Theme
Their drinking is compulsive
Their running is convulsive,
They're morally repulsive,
The Hash House Harriers.
CHORUS:
Da da da da (snap fingers twice)
Da da da da (snap fingers twice)
Da da da da, da da da da, da da da da
Their flatulence is rude and
Their genitals protrude when
They're running in the nude in
The Hash House Harriers.
They're always shiggy tracking
From constantly bush-whacking,
Intelligence they're lacking,
The Hash House Harriers.
Da da da da, Down Down, etc . . .
HASH HYMN
Melody - Swing Low, Sweet Chariot
Note: gestures accompany words
I looked over Jordan and what did I see,
Coming for to carry me home,
A band of angels coming after me,
Coming for to carry me home.
CHORUS:
Swing low, sweet chariot,
Coming for to carry me home,
Swing low, sweet chariot,
Coming for to carry me home.
I'm sometimes up and sometimes down,
Comin' for to carry me home,
But still my soul feels heavenly bound.
Comin' for to carry me home.
If you get there before I do,
Coming for to carry me home,
Tell all my friends that I'm coming too,
Coming for to carry me home.
(repeat with variations: humming and motions only, silence and motions only, double-time)
HEAD!
Head!
Who said head?
I'll have some of that,
So I did, and it was good
And then we f*cked.
We f*cked for hours
Uprooting trees & shrubs & flowers,
like Vikings, with horns on our HEAD!
HEAD! Who said head?
He Ought to be Publicly Pissed On
He ought to be publicly pissed upon,
He ought to be publicly shot,
He ought to be tied to a urinal,
And left there to fester and rot,
Drink it down, down, down...
HER LEFT TIT
Melody - My Bonnie Lies Over the Ocean
Her left tit hangs down to her belly,
Her right tit hangs down to her knee.
If her left tit did equal her right tit,
She'd get lots of weenie from me.
Drink it down, down, down . . .
HERE'S TO ________ (BASIC DOWN-DOWN SONG)
Melody - Itself
VERSION # 1
Here's to ,
He's so blue (he's true blue) (he's a blue)
He's a Hasher,
Through and through,
He's a wanker (he's a pisspot) (he's an asshole)
So they say,
He'll never get to heaven (Tried to go to heaven,)
In a long, long way (But he went the other way)
So drink it down, down, down . . .
VERSION # 2
Here's to ,
She's a damn fine gal,
Here's to ,
She's a damn fine gal,
So drink, chug-a-lug, chug-a-lug,
chug-a-lug, chug-a-lug, chug-a-lug, chug-a-lug,
Here's to ,
She's a horse's ass.
Hey, hey, hey, hey, etc . . .
HIS ONE-SKIN
(Melody - My Bonnie Lies Over the Ocean)
His one skin hangs down to his two skin,
His two skin hangs down to his three,
His three skin hangs down to his foreskin,
His foreskin hangs down to his knee.
Roll back, Roll back,
please roll back my foreskin for me, for me,
Roll back, Roll back,
please roll back my foreskin for me, for me,
Drink it down, down, down...
He's the Meanest
(To: Okinawa Down Down tune)
He's the meanest,
He sucks the horse's p*nis,
He's the meanest,
He's a horse's ass.
Ever since he found it,
All he does is pound it,
He's the meanest,
He's a horse's ass.
He's always pissing on us,
He's rotten and dishonest,
He's the meanest,
He's a horse's ass.
Drinking down, down, down, down,
Down, down, down, down,
Down, down, down, down,
Down, down, down, down.
MEET THE HASHERS
(Melody - the Flintstones)
Hashers, meet the hasher
They�re the biggest drunks in history
From the hash of the Hague
They�re the leaders in debauchery
Half minds, trailing shiggy through the years
Watch them, as they down a lot of beer
Down-down, down-down down-down
Down down down down down down down down
Down down down down down
Down down down down down
MOOSE SONG
Melody - Sweet Betsy from Pike
Contributed by Zippy, Pike's Peak H4 (some verses by Flying Booger,
jHavelina HHH; and Satan, Pittsburg HHH)
This is for BloWinkle!
CHORUS (SUNG WHILE MAKING ANTLERS ON HEAD WITH
HANDS):
Moose, moose, I love a moose,
I've never had anything quite like a moose,
My life has been merry,
My women been loose,
But nothing compares to the love of a moose.
When I'm in the mood for a very fine lay,
I go to the closet and pull out some hay,
I open the window and spread it around,
Because moose will come running when there's hay on the ground.
HARRIERS' VERSES:
When I was a young lad I played with the girls,
I'd fondle their titties and twirl their curls,
But my true love ran off with a classmate named Bruce,
I never got treated that way by a moose.
Women like pearls and diamonds and cars,
I spend all my money on them in bars,
But a moose is content to be tied to a tree,
While I find other mooses to satisfy me.
Now I've made it with all kinds of beasties with hair,
I'd make it with snakes if their fangs were not there,
I've made it with walrus, two ducks and a goose,
But I've never had anything quite like a moose.
Now gorillas are fine for a Saturday night,
And lions and tigers, they puts up a fight,
But it just ain't the same when you slams your caboose
As the feeling you gets when you humps with a moose.
HARRIETTES' VERSES:
All my past lovers did brag about size,
Those tales of twelve inches were nothing but lies,
But a moose is the size that a man ought to be,
That's why from now on it's mooses for me.
When I was much younger I read dirty books,
I stroked myself with each gazing look,
But nothing can make my eyes start to twinkle,
Then getting it off with that stud Bullwinkle.
Now that I'm older and into my years,
I'll have you to know that I shed no tears,
While I lay by the fire with a glass of Mateus,
Playing hide the salami with Marvin the Moose.
SHITTY TRAIL (A Song For The Hares)
Shitty trail (It sucked)
Shitty trail (really f*cked)
The hares went and laid a shitty trail (shitty trail)
S-H-I-T-T-Y T-R-A-I-L
Shitty trail (It sucked)
Shitty trail (really f*cked)
I would rather drink beer than hash your shitty trail,
S-H-I-T-T-Y T-R-A-I-L
THANK GOD SHE FINALLY SHUT UP
Melody - Looney Tunes Theme
An excellent down-down song for harriettes
Thank God she finally shut up,
She's always fuckin' bitchin',
Now drink your beer, get out of here,
Get back into the kitchen!
THEY OUGHT TO BE PUBLICLY PISSED ON
Melody - My Bonnie Lies Over the Ocean
They ought to be publicly pissed on,
They ought to be publicly shot,
They ought to be tied to a urinal,
And left there to fester and rot,
Drink it down, down, down . . .
THIS IS YOUR DOWN-DOWN SONG
Melody - Ta-Rah-Rah-Boom Te-Ay
This is your Down-Down song,
It isn't very long. . . .
Drink it Down, Down, Down
12 DAYS OF CHRISTMAS (Hash Version)
Words in brackets to be sung by rest of circle. To be sung to the 12 days of Christmas tune (if you hadn't guessed!)
On the 1st day of hashing my true love gave to me... a hand j*b that wasn't worth a f**k (worth a f**k)
On the 2nd day of hashing my true love gave to me... 2 tons of chalk and a hand j*b that wasn't worth a f**k (worth a f**k)
On the 3rd day of hashing my true love gave to me... 3 check backs, 2 tons of chalk and a hand j*b that wasn't worth a f**k (worth a f**k)
On the 4th day of hashing my true love gave to me... 4 false trails, 3.........etc.
On the 5th day of hashing my true love gave to me... 5 round the world (beer on head and turn 360 degrees), 4........etc.
On the 6th day of hashing my true love gave to me.. 6 sixty-niners, 5......etc.
On the 7th day of hashing my true love gave to me.. 7 sweaty sports bras, 6.......etc.
On the 8th day of hashing my true love gave to me.. 8 aching arseholes, 7.......etc.
On the 9th day of hashing my true love gave to me.. 9 gnawed-off nipples, 8.........etc.
On the 10th day of hashing my true love gave to me.. 10 tons of shiggy (what) 10 tons of shiggy (what) 10 tons of shiggy (what) 10 tons of shiggy (what), 9.........etc.
On the 11th day of hashing my true love gave to me.. 11 asses icing, 10 tons.......etc.
On the 12th day of hashing my true love gave to me.. 12 kegs of beer, 11.......etc.
WALKING AROUND IN WOMEN'S UNDERWEAR
(Wonderland H3 version)
Lacy things, the ex is missing.
Didn't ask, for her permission
I'm wearing her clothes,
Her silk panty hose.
Walking around in women's underwear.
In the store, there's a teddy.
With little straps, like spaghetti.
It holds me so tight,
Like handcuffs at night.
Walking around in women's underwear
In the hash there's a guy named Buck.
He pretends that I am Murphy Brown.
He'll say "Are you ready?"
I'll say, "Whoa man! Lets wait until Cheap Thrills is out of town."
Later on, if you wanna,
We can dress, like Madonna.
Put on some eyeshade, and join the parade.
Walking around in women's underwear.
Lacy things, missing.
Didn't ask, permission.
Wearing her clothes, silk panty hose.
Walking around in women's underwear.
We came out at Wonderland.
What's next? Oh my gosh!
Walking around in women's underwear.
Walking around in women's underwear...
WE'VE GOT VIRGINS
Melody - Frere Jacques
We've got virgins,
We've got virgins,
At our hash,
At our hash,
Gonna get'em drunked up,
Gonna get'em drunked up,
Down the hatch,
Down the hatch,
So drink it down, down, down . . .
WHY WAS SHE BORN SO BEAUTIFUL?
(Done as a tribute to hasher,
usually after a down down song,
but sometimes as the down down song)
Why was he (she) born so beautiful,
Why was he (she) born at all.
He's (she's) no f*cking use to anyone,
He's (she's) no f*cking use at all.
He (she) might be a joy to his (her) mother,
But he's (she's) a pain in the asshole to me!
(Sometimes mooning the recipient)
Whip It Out at the Ball Game
(Melody - Take Me Out to the Ball Game)
Whip it out at the ball game
Wave it round at the crowd
Dip it in peanuts and cracker jack
We don't care if you give it a whack
'Cause it's shoot your goo at the ball game
If you don't come it's a shame
Coz it's one, two, you've covered in goo
At the old ball game
This Is Your Hashing Song
This is your Hashing song,
It isn't very long
Drink it down, down, down...
YOGI BEAR
Melody – Camptown Races
FIRST VERSE:
There is a bear in the deep dark woods,
Yogi, Yogi,
There is a bear in the deep dark woods,
Yogi, Yogi Bear.
FIRST CHORUS:
Yogi, Yogi Bear,
Yogi, Yogi Bear,
There is a bear in the deep dark woods,
Yogi, Yogi Bear.
SAMPLE VERSE:
Yogi has a little friend,
Boo-Boo, Boo-Boo,
Yogi has a little friend,
Boo-Boo, Boo-Boo Bear!
SAMPLE CHORUS:
Boo-Boo, Boo-Boo Bear,
Boo-Boo, Boo-Boo Bear,
Yogi has a little friend,
Boo-Boo, Boo-Boo Bear
ADDITIONAL VERSES::
Boo-Boo has a girlfriend,
Cyndi, Cyndi,
Boo-Boo has a girlfriend,
Cyndi, Cyndi Bear
Cyndi has a shaven snatch,
Grizzly, Grizzly,
Cyndi has a shaven snatch,
Grizzly, Grizzly Bear
Cyndi likes it on the ice,
Polar, Polar,
Cyndi likes it on the ice,
Polar, Polar Bear!
Cyndi missed her period,
Pregnant, Pregnant,
Cyndi missed her period,
Pregnant, Pregnant Bear!
Yogi has a girlfriend,
Suzi, Suzi,
Yogi has a girlfriend,
Suzi, Suzi Bear!
Suzi doesn’t wash her snatch,
Gummy, Gummy,
Suzi doesn’t wash her snatch,
Gummy, Gummy Bear!
Cyndi wears lingerie,
Teddy, Teddy,
Cyndi wears lingerie,
Teddy, Teddy Bear!
Suzi likes it up the rear,
Dirty, Dirty,
Suzi likes it up the rear,
Dirty, Dirty Bear!
Suzi she has great big tits,
More than, More than,
Suzi she has great big tits,
More than, More than I can bear
Yogi didn’t use a condom,
Daddy, Daddy,
Yogi didn’t use a condom,
Daddy, Daddy Bear
Boo-Boo likes it upside down,
Koala, Koala,
Boo-Boo likes it upside down,
Koala’s not a Bear!
Boo-Boo has a twelve-inch cock,
Black Bear, Black Bear,
Boo-Boo’s only three feet tall,
Lucky, Lucky,
Yogi’s a lucky bear
Boo-Boo takes it up the butt,
Gay, Gay,
Boo-Boo takes it up the butt,
Gay, Gay Bear!
Yogi didn’t wipe his butt,
Brown, Brown,
Yogi didn’t wipe his butt,
Brown, Brown Bear!
Boo-Boo likes both black and white,
Panda, Panda,
Boo-Boo likes both black and white,
Panda, Panda Bear!
Yogi got a case of crabs,
Itchy, Itchy,
Yogi got a case of crabs,
Itchy, Itchy!
Yogi’s got an M-16,
Right to, Right to,
Yogi’s got an M-16,
Right to, Right to Bear!
Cyndi and Suzie are making out,
Klondike, Klondike,
Cyndi and Suzie are making out,
Klondike, Klondike Bear!
Suzie’s fucking vegetables,
Cucum, Cucum,
Suzie’s fucking vegetables,
Cucum, Cucum Bear!
Yogi has a forest friend,
Smokey, Smokey
Yogi has a forest friend
Smokey, Smokey Bear
Smokey, Smokey Bear
Smokey, Smokey Bear
Yogi has a forest friend
Smokey, Smokey Bear
Smokey says to douse the flames
Careful, Careful
Smokey says to douse the flames
Careful, Careful Bear
Careful, Careful Bear
Careful, Careful Bear
Smokey says to douse the flames
Careful, Careful Bear
Only you can stop the blaze
Smokey, Smokey
Only you can stop the blaze
Smokey, Smokey Bear
Smokey, Smokey Bear
Smokey, Smokey Bear
Only you can stop the blaze
Smokey, Smokey Bear
Yogis got a friend with a long bill
Plata plata,
Yogis got a friend with a long bill
Plata platypus
Plata platypus
Plata platypus
I don’t know what he is. He’s definitely not a bear.
On On
No comments:
Post a Comment